Reality Check

I am the queen of being hard on myself.  If you don’t believe me, ask any one of my best friends.  I will take the weight of the world onto my shoulders if I think it will help a bad situation turn good.  (By the way, that doesn’t help.  Sometimes it just creates more problems.)  So, before I continue with this friendly reminder, let me first say that I completely understand where all of you are coming from.  That said, I have something to say.

I love this Sisterhood.  I love that we interact every day.  I love that we look to each other for encouragement. I love that we are friends.  Not just online friends but real friends.  I know that I can count on any one of you should I need something.  And I love that.  It makes me happy.  But one thing that does not make me happy is seeing people being hard on themselves for having a bad week or a few bad weeks.  It hurts my incredibly sensitive heart.

Look, folks.  Weigh loss is only a PART of our journey here.  Sure, the weight loss part of your journey is the biggest reason WHY you’re here at the Sisterhood, but we all have to keep in mind that weight loss isn’t our life.  It’s part of our life.  Weight loss is a incredibly tricky thing.  I like to look at it like it’s a puzzle.  You find all of your pieces, figure out where they fit and connect to one another, and then you have the last piece into place and your puzzle is together!  You’ve figured it out!  And the weight melts right off.

Now, we all know what happens when we try to move a finished puzzle, right?  Odds are, unless you’ve mastered the art of moving a finished puzzle (If you have, I hate you. Okay, not really.), that at least part of the puzzle is going to come apart.  And what do you do?  You just put them back together again.  Right?

This happens in life, too.  When things become out of routine, your puzzle pieces come apart.  So what if they come apart?  It happens.  Conditions have changed, and it would be impossible for the pieces to not come apart.  You can’t always control life changes that create unbalance in your life.  You can’t always control that one day you’ve had such a crap day that you want ice cream, and by God, you’re going to have ice cream.

So what if you have ice cream that one day?

OK, OK.  I know what you’re thinking.  But I don’t want to let my team down!  I get that.  I do.  But we didn’t put you into teams so that you would be afraid of letting each other down.  We put you into teams so that you could pick each other up and cheer each other on.  We put you into teams because for some people, being a part of a team helps them focus better.  And it lets you get to know each other a little better.

I get that you are a bunch of competitive people.  I am competitive too.  Winning is fun, but it isn’t what’s important.  Our journeys are what’s important.  Reaching our goals and creating new life habits that are going to make us happier people is what’s important.

Think about how far you’ve come.  Not in terms of numbers, but in terms of life.  Even if you’ve only been with us for a short while, I’m certain that you’ve created at least one change that is going to help you in your journey.  One change leads to another and a bunch of changes lead to happiness.  I’m not telling you to not be competitive.  I’m not telling you to just throw every thing out of the window.  I’m telling you to just keep at it.  BE PROUD OF YOURSELVES.  If you hit a snag, don’t be so hard on yourselves!  Pick yourselves up (or ask one of us to do it) and start again.  A bad week isn’t the end of the world.  A bad week is fuel for the fire to have a good week next week.

So, now I’m challenging each and every one of you to think about this week in a new way.  If the scales are bad this week (and I know they won’t be), then write me a post focusing on the good things instead of the bad.  Then use those good things to turn around the bad things.  I KNOW you can do it.

And never forget, I’m proud of every single one of you every single day.

  • http://www.traveling-well.com Karena @ Traveling Well

    This was a great post, April. And so true. It’s funny – I came to the Sisterhood in “weight loss” mode, but it’s no longer my focus. I questioned for a time if I really would still fit in here, being that I wasn’t weighing in weekly. But no one cared about that. No one treated me like the odd man out. rather, they applauded me for having the courage to step away from the scale, step away from the calorie counter, and look for my rewards outside of the numbers.

    I’m weighing in for this challenge, but after the 31st I’m giving it a pass again. But I’ll still be here with the Sisterhood, because of the friendships and the support I’ve found here.

  • http://twitter.com/girlsworld Kirsten

    That was my worry in the beginning. Would they accept me even if I had no weight to lose? And they have…for almost 3 years now. Love the Sisterhood and love the friends I’ve made.

  • http://twitter.com/girlsworld Kirsten

    Absolutely fantastic analogy! But it’s so true, and I’ve been feeling the same way as you. Life is messy. We have to do the best we can, and some days that may not be anywhere close to what we want. If we all remember (or even focus on figuring out) why we are choosing to be healthier, then there will be more good days than bad. Because the reasons for making good decisions will be different than the number on the scale.

  • Anonymous

    Thanks for the AWESOME post April! Just what I needed!

  • http://www.babytealeaves.blogspot.com Christie O.

    Damn you april for making me cry like a baby.

    I love you.

    I love the puzzle analogy, so.much. I can’t even tell you.

  • http://happyeverafter-carrie.blogspot.com/ Carrie

    That is exactly what I needed to hear today. Thank you. Thanks for putting things into perspective!

  • Anonymous

    I love this post. You are so right we are hard on ourselves and of course competitive too and don’t want to let our teams down. I love and appreciate the support of all of my sisters here. You have inspired me to do better and my running a half-marathon would not have happened without all of you!

  • Anonymous

    Good Lord, that is a PERFECT analogy.

    You’re one smart jerk.

  • Anonymous

    VERY, VERY well said! I couldn’t agree more and love the puzzle analogy! Thanks for caring so much… THAT is why I love the Sisterhood. Such an amazing group of authentic chics and dude!

  • http://smartstrongsexy.blogspot.com Brooke F

    thank you. for this blog. for everything. love you!! :)

  • Pubsgal

    Preach it, Sister April! Love the puzzle analogy; that is so my life right now.

  • Nancy

    I don’t know how I missed this before. I’m so glad that Christie pointed it out for me. It hit home so much. Love you April. Thank you so much for being you!