April

This week was face off week on The Biggest Loser.  Each contestant was competing one on one against someone from the other team.  There was a bit of drama in the gym.  That seems to happen every so often on this show, but I’m not going to recap the episode this week.

The Biggest Loser is a reality TV show.  There is no way around it.  The people that ask and get chosen to go on this show leave their homes, go to this TV set that they call the ranch, have their lives filmed for months  just for the producers to edit months of filming into an hour of TV each week.  Depending on the editing, we can view contestants as good, bad, annoying, or just plain hateful.

Now don’t get me wrong, Tracy bugs the snot out of me.  I think she’s in it for the money and unless I’m proven wrong, I really believe that she will not maintain her weightloss.  It’s characters like this that can really make you not want to watch a show. (Or if you love to hate “characters” you live for contestants like this.)

I keep in mind that the reason contestants and/or characters like this are cast is so the show can get ratings.  Drama creates ratings always.  And it kind of is a shame, but I don’t let these people bother me.

I don’t let them bother me because I know that every now and then we’ll get someone special on the show.  Someone so special that they touch your heart and make you cry and all you want to do is give them great big hugs.  These people are diamonds.  They are in this to change their lives.

This season, we’re lucky enough to have two of these diamonds.  Abby and Shay.  I don’t need to tell you their stories, because if you’re reading this, you’ve seen it.  You’ve cried with them.  Your heart hurts with theirs as you hear the pain that they’ve gone through.  They have survived things that most people may not be able to.

They survived.  And now they’re ready to take the step to live.  I feel so privileged to be able to watch the transformations happening inside and outside of the both of them.  It is nothing short of amazing.  They are the true inspirations of weight loss.  You know that they will use what they learn, they will go far, and they will teach and inspire others.

And THEY are why I watch this show.

Yeah, so, this challenge was enough to make me want to stick a fork in my brain and twist it.  Not because it wasn’t a fantastic challenge, but because of me.  I knew that this is a hard time of year for me to lose weight.  I knew that I gave myself a goal or something ridiculous like 10lbs.  Any other time of year but this time of year, 10lbs may not be so ridiculous.  This time of year, it was like shooting myself in the foot.

Yet, still I was frustrated.  Even though I basically went into maintain mode and have been maintaining a my weight (give or take a few pounds), I was still frustrated.  Then I realized that I’ve been going strong for two years with only a two month period of maintaining.  Mentally, I was worn out.  I needed a break.

Allowing myself to take a break (in anything, but especially weight loss) is hard for me.  I feel like I always have to keep focused, and if I don’t, a lot of times, I’ll just quit.  It took a bit in me to realize that this time, taking a break isn’t quitting.  It’s just simply taking a break.  This doesn’t mean that I go crazy and quit exercising and eating right.  It means that I do enough to maintain where I am.  I still eat healthy (with a few treats thrown in) and I still exercise, just on a smaller scale.

So, I didn’t lose this challenge.  If I’m being honest, I’m up.  I’m not thrilled about it, but I’m okay with it.

Once I realized that my cans weren’t really adding up, I decided that I would give what I set out for my goal.  Because this challenge wasn’t just about us.  It also was about giving back to the community.  To help those who really need it.

Also, I’ve decided that from here on out, whatever I lose during a challenge, I’m also going to give food back to the community.  It felt nice to go shopping knowing that I was going to help feed someone who can’t afford it themselves.

So, for our parade of cans, here are my 160 oz. (well okay fine, I added another 12oz so I could make the “J”.  I’ll give that 12oz too.)

In recent seasons of The Biggest Loser, they’ve decided to send the contestants home mid-season for a week.  This time only the black team went.  (I’m not going to recap because if you’re interested in this post, odds are you’ve seen the episode.)

I’m really on the fence about sending contestants home for a week.  Sure, the reunions with their families makes for great tissue time on our couches.  Sure, it’s a great test for the contestants to see if they are ready to do it at home without the controlled environment of the ranch.  It’s great to see if they have the discipline to stay away from their favorite foods and hit the gym like they’re suppose to.

The fan in me likes this.  The little trainer wannabe in me is screaming NO!

It isn’t as if I think they can’t do it.  I know they can.  And I know they want to prove to everyone that they can do it.  But here is what I don’t like.  While on the ranch, they are learning what they need to lose weight when they get home, but things are SO controlled at the ranch.  They don’t go grocery shopping.  Bob and Jillian tell them what they can and can’t eat, and they’re on very strict schedules.  Even the slightest of changes, changes they may not even realize took place, could affect their weigh-in.  To these people who are at an emotional point of re-building and re-inventing themselves, a bad weigh-in could be harmful.

I know.  I’ve been there.  I remember over a year and a half ago now, I was on a roll losing weight.  Week after week I was losing 2#s one week 4#s the next.  There wasn’t a week that I didn’t pull a number that I wasn’t happy with.  While all of this was going on, I was learning about who I was on the inside.  This was an extremely emotional time for me.  One week, I was excited.  I had done everything as I had done previously, I stood on the scale and it said I had lost nothing.  HUGE blow.  It took a lot not go to into panic mode.  I almost did.  But I did what I had learned from Jillian, and I re-traced my steps and found my mistake.

That  all said, for the most part, they all did well.  They proved their point, and for the ones who may not have, this could fuel their determination to do well next week.  So, maybe sending them home isn’t so bad afterall.

Can you tell I’m indecisive?

So, what did you think about this week’s episode?  If you were on the ranch, would you want to risk a week home at this point?  Could you have the discipline to get it done?

Seriously.  That’s all I can think right now.  Are you seriously kidding me.  I’m warning you now, there are spoilers ahead because I’m going to go on a little rant here.

So, this is the week that they split into teams.  The happy little world of Bob and Jillian training together has exited the gym, Teams Blue and Black has entered.

So, if you watched, you saw the challenge where one person would end up with control to pick the teams.  I was POSITIVE that the previews last week just wanted us to believe that Tracy won it, but she really didn’t. Have you notice they do that?  They’ll show a person’s face at weigh-in, and you’re just SURE it’s a bad weigh-in, then they cut to commercial, come back, and the person loses 12 lbs.  Stinkers.

But no, Tracy won the power to choose the teams.  And of course, she put herself on Bob’s team.  I love, love, loved Jillian’s reaction.  Jillian said she was just chickening out of the “beatings” and that she wanted to “beat her within an inch of her life”.  Did anyone else crack up at that?  Seriously, I was rolling.

Now, a smart and logical person who has already ruffled feathers in this game would try to avoid pissing people off at this point.  Not Tracy.  That girl is something else.

It’s clear to me now that Tracy is in it for the money.  She is there to play the game.  Okay, so I admit, I could use the money and would want to win too.  But here’s the difference:  to ME, the money would be the icing on the cake to getting my life back.  The people who set out to win the money first will be the ones who gain their weight back.  I believe Bob said this himself.  (Icing on the cake was probably a bad saying to use, huh? Hmm.)

Did you hear her when she said she needs to start putting her first?  Okay, yes.  She needs to put her first when it comes to her body and her health, but honestly I just could not piss people off around me to do that.  I WANT to believe that my disliking of Tracy is the reality TV peeps’ work here and that Tracy isn’t as she seems, but man she really annoys me.  I seriously disliked Vicky a couple of seasons ago, I think I seriously dislike Tracy even more.

My hope is that she gets it while on the ranch.  That the light bulb goes off.  That she realizes that her health is more important than the money.  I just don’t know if she will.

I think the contestant of the week award should go to Abby.  She was the only one not to participate in the challenge for control.  She decided that the possibility of having to eat a 1000 calorie piece of cake just wasn’t worth it.  SHE GETS IT.

So, what do you think?  Do you think Tracy will “get it” before she leaves the ranch?

Okay, you may now carry on.

I’ve been sitting here trying to think of the right words to say, and I realize I have nothing.  The challenge has been nothing but a struggle for me, and I just am not sure what to say.

I knew going in that this time of year is hard for me.  I can stay focused on weight loss from January through June.  Then July hits, and I become a little more social.  Then September hits, and can anyone say football?  Then we get through October and November is here and it’s holidays, holidays, holidays.

The exact same thing happened for me last year.  But the difference in last year and this year is my exercise.  Last year at this time, I was working out 6 times a week, an hour a day.  This year?  Not so much.

One day when I was doing my Chalean Extreme work out, I felt a sharp, shooting pain in my elbow. So, I stopped those work outs to give my elbow time to heal.  So, I joined in the EA Sports Active challenge and it’s a great work out, but I went from burning up to 600 calories a work out to around 150.

The problem with that is, I didn’t change my eating.  See, I was eating food to fuel a 600 calorie burn.  So, the solution was to cut out a snack, right?  Right.  My body was SO mad at me.  It’s been on such a strict eating schedule for almost two years that it just didn’t know what to do when it “skipped” a meal time.

So then I got frustrated, and for a few days, I said screw it.  THEN I got on the scales.

I’m embarrassed to say how much weight I gained, but let me assure you that it was yet another eye opener.  I was seriously close to getting out of control, and that is not something I will ever let happen again.

Like so many of you I feel like I have so much going on that I sometimes don’t have time to think.  When I began my weight loss journey, I had TONS of time, so all I did was work out.  Now, that’s not the case.  I love my life right now, and I’m determined to figure it all out.  I know I will.  So, I’m working now to find balance.  Balance with my work outs, balance with my food, balance with my social life for right now, and balance with blogging.

Every day so far since Sunday.  (Okay, Monday I walked because my shepherd had a playdate with a new dog, but we walked fast and for 3 miles, so that’s something right?)  It’s not the hour work outs, that I used to do, but finally I’ve gotten my body used to eating a little less.  And I’m enjoying running. (What the hell?!) So, I’m happy to say that this week, I’m back down to 145.4.  Yes, that’s up for the challenge, but TRUST me when I say it’s down from last week.

Balance, April.  Just focus on balance.  I’ll get there.

This has to be one of my favorite weeks ever of The Biggest Loser.  Seriously.  How many times have you thought, I just can’t eat healthy because I’m eating out.  Well this week, BL showed you that you can.

They closed the kitchen and told the contestants they had to order out all week.  The looks on the contestants faces clearly said, “oh crap.”  You could tell they were scared.  But honestly, this was a real world challenge.  Because even when losing weight, there are going to be times when eating at home just isn’t an option.  This week taught the contestants how to eat out in a healthy way.  This is a tool they will all have to use at some point when they leave the ranch, so good onya, Biggest Loser.

Is it as easy as eating at home?  Nope.  Is it as fun? You know it isn’t.  Seriously, who wants to go to a Mexican restaurant and ask them to take the chips away.  Or not drink a margarita? No one does, but the truth is, if you’re serious about losing weight, it can be done and they totally showed you how tonight.

Tip: I’ve found that if I know where I’m going, menus are pretty easy to find on the internet.  I usually will scope the menu out before I go and make the best choice possible.  If eating out is spur of the moment, then I always go with grilled veggies and go with sauces on the side.

Onto the pop challenge:  Did you guess what the healthiest meal was?  I saw some people on twitter disagreeing with the show.  Any thoughts there?

Is it me or is Tracey just the biggest drama queen?  I mean really. Anyone else on that show cries, and I cry right along with them.  She cries, and I sit there with my arms crossed.  Now, I know that this could just be reality show producers creating drama, but for now, I ain’t buying the tears, Tracey.  Sorry.

I’m not going to talk about the weigh-in or who gets kicked off in case you haven’t watched it yet.  I will say that if Tracey wins more power last week, I may throw up.

Now it’s your turn! Hit me with your thoughts of the show!  What did you think?  Did you join in our Twitter chat?  We had a TON of fun and we’re going to keep it up!  Next week BE THERE.